A few jokes

1. My girlfriend thought I'd never be able to make a car out of spaghetti… You should've seen her face when I drove pasta!
2. Coffee has a rough time in our house. It gets mugged every single morning!
3. What did the duck say when she purchased new lipstick? Put it on my bill!
4. I just found out that I'm colour blind. The news came completely out of the green!
5. Why didn't the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
6. I once met a pig that did karate…we called him Pork Chop!
7. What should a lawyer always wear to a court? A good lawsuit!
8. Somebody stole all my lamps….and I couldn't be more de-lighted!